Invention #1 - Chain-Link Climbing Shoes

This invention is meant to make climbing a chain-link fence easier. Climbing a fence with big shoes is difficult because the toes of the shoe are too big to fit into the tiny holes in the fence. My invention puts the perfect tip on the end of the shoe for fitting into the holes of a chain link fence.

Below are a few pictures of my prototypes:

      

These shoes are perfect for evading police and dogs, bank heists, quick getaways, and the like. Obviously these aren't in full production yet, the patent on these little gems is pending. However, you can still pre-order your pair now, with a minimal deposit.

This is the first installment of what promises to be many posts about some my ideas for various inventions. Granted, some of these ideas will be better than others. But mostly, some of them will be worse and more ridiculous than others.

Prank Call

While driving home today, there was a car in front of me that had a phone number painted on the rear window. It looked as though the car might have been for sale, but it didn't say that anywhere on the car. I decided to give the phone number a call just to have a little fun with it.

I dialed the number while sitting at a red light. The light turned green, we started moving and the phone started to ring. The car moved slowly so I changed lanes and started to pass it. The man driving the car answered the phone right as I came up along side of him. I glanced over and noticed that he was hispanic.

All he said was "hello," but it caught me off guard. I realized that I had no idea what I was going to say. Probably subconsciously affected by his physical appearance, I said, "Hello, is Carlos there?" I definitely wasn't prepared for his answer. "This is him."

I panicked. Do I pretend to be interested in buying the car? Was it even really for sale? Why would someone put their phone number on the back of their vehicle? Why did I call this person? How is his name Carlos?!? With all these thoughts, the only words I was albe to process were, "uhh, sorry, I have the wrong number."

Classy Damon. Only after confirming that I am speaking with the person I was intending to reach by dialing the phone number do I think to say that I have misdialed. I hung up the phone. By this time I was in front of him and he probably saw me drop my phone from my ear as the call disconnected. I felt awkward for the next few miles while he stayed right behind me.

Don't think that I didn't learn from this experience. I did. I learned that the next time I call a random number I see on a car, and the person answers, and I ask for a random name, and it happens to be the person driving the car, I decided that I will NOT say I have the wrong number and hang up. Instead, I'll try talking about how my day went or something, making him think that he should know who I am, and that he should care about how my day went. It'll be epic.

Galstooks

When I was in Ukraine, I bought a lot of ties. Since my return, these ties have been kept in rubbermade bins. Every time I needed a tie, I would fumble around the bins to try to find one that went with what I was wearing. However, that all ended on my birthday a couple days ago.

My amazing wife spent much of the past several months building shelves specifically for my ties. I have mentioned that it would be nice to have something like that a few times over the past years, but I never thought anything of it. I figured something this awesome only existed in fairytales. But it's real. Now a reality right in my closet! All my ties are on display so that I can easily find the exact one I want to wear.

Thanks Chelsey, you're the best!!

Quarter of the Century

"Quarter of the Century" was the celebration of my twenty-fifth birthday. Following tradition, I created a list of 25 things that I wanted to accomplish on my birthday. Here's how my day went:

#1 - Wake up in my sleeping quarters

This isn't exactly what the bed looked like when I woke up, but you get the picture. Literally, you get this picture.

#2 - Flip a quarter to make decisions throughout the day

Let chance decide how the day will go.